Dean McDermott is “taking accountability” for his and Tori Spelling’s separation, he said in an interview with Daily Mail published on November 15. The 56-year-old actor admitted that his drunken rages would frighten Tori, 50, and their children.
“All Tori’s ever done to this day is want me to be happy and healthy, and I inflicted a lot of damage and pain on that woman,” Dean confessed to the outlet. “I’m taking accountability for that today. And it’s the biggest amend that I’m ever going to have to make.”
The Open Range actor recalled how much of a “total fairytale” his and Tori’s “beautiful love story” was at the beginning of their relationship. The two began dating in 2005, and they got married a year later. Dean and Tori share kids Stella, Hattie, Liam, Finn and Beau.
“Love at first sight and getting married in the most beautiful way possible,” Dean pointed out. “It was a dream come true. And then, we had to come back to Hollywood and deal with all the s**t people gave us. … After we got married, they were all saying, ‘Give it six months.’ Well, so much for six months — we showed you because it’s been 18 years and five kids.”
However, their marriage eventually crumbled, which came to light earlier this year after Dean posted — then quickly deleted — an Instagram post announcing their split, which Daily Mail reported was an “intemperate post” he made during a “drink and drug binge.” Dean and Tori have been separated ever since. The Tournament alum admitted that his alcoholism “led to the brokenness” in their marriage.
“Alcohol made me feel good enough,” he explained to the outlet. “I started feeling good enough until it got to a point where it didn’t — it ended up in isolation. It ended up with me drinking a fifth of tequila every night, seven days a week, and a handful of narcos by myself with a beautiful family in the other room.”
Dean added, “That’s what it led to, and that’s what led to the brokenness and to what happened between me and Tori. I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t live that life anymore. I was tired of the anger and the yelling.”
His “alcohol-fueled rages,” the outlet noted, left Tori and their five kids “petrified” in their household. Dean recalled passing out from drinking so much that Tori would check on him to make sure he was still breathing.
Now that Tori and Dean are living apart, he claimed during his interview that they started talking again. Although he is currently sober and dating Lily Calo, Dean noted that he still struggles to grapple with the end of his and Tori’s marriage due to his drinking habits.
“It’s going to be living the rest of my life making amends because I took something that was really beautiful and I just tore it down year after year, day after day,” the professionally trained chef said.
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).