Back in the 2000s, Paris Hilton‘s star rose right alongside that of her BFF, Nicole Richie. The duo starred together in reality hit The Simple Life from 2003-2007, and according to Paris, to this day Nicole remains her “ride or die.” “Nicole Richie and I were ride or die from our terrible twos,” Paris writes in Paris: The Memoir, released on March 14. “And we’ll stay that way until the world ends. Nicole is so genuinely kind and sweet, she catches people off guard with her raunchy one-liners, and the reaction she gets from people is comedy gold. Comedy has to be fearless, and Nicole doesn’t hesitate.”
But Paris, now 42, also revealed that Nicole, 41, wasn’t the initial first choice for the show. Producers had hoped they’d get her little sister Nicky Hilton to do the show alongside Paris. Per E! News, Paris really wanted to do it, and writes that she “begged Nicky to do it with me.” Nicky’s response was less than enthusiastic and even downright discouraging, the new mom of one claims. “‘Don’t be insane,’ Nicky said,” Paris writes. “‘You’ll embarrass yourself.'”
And it turns out that for Paris, The Simple Life years were anything but “simple.” She revealed a heart wrenching decision to get an abortion around the same time the show premiered on Fox in 2003. (The show later moved to E! where the series concluded four years later.) “I was terrified and heartsick,” she wrote of discovering a pregnancy by ex-boyfriend Jason Shaw. “I felt paralyzed by an anxiety that took root in my body and grew like poison ivy.”
“No one can ever know how hard it is to face this impossible choice unless she’s faced it herself,” she continued. “It’s an intensely private agony that’s impossible to explain. The only reason I’m talking about it now is that so many women are facing it, and they feel so alone and judged and abandoned. I want
them to know that they’re not alone, and they don’t owe anyone an explanation. When there is no right way—all that’s left is what is. What you know you have to do. And you do it, even though it breaks your heart.”
Ultimately, though, she knew that she “made the right choice,” she writes.