‘Game Of Thrones’: Becoming Someone Else
Arya was once again scrubbing a corpse in the House of Black and White. Unlike the high energy Arya we’re used to seeing, she was much calmer as she stripped off all the dirt and grime of this unknown person. At the end of every life, we all sort of become “no one,” don’t we?
However, Arya was still curious. What happened to these bodies? She was so ready for her next challenge — the Game of Faces. When the mean chick asked who she was, Arya replied, “No one.” However, she didn’t seem so sure about it. Later, Jaqen asked Arya who she was. “Arya,” she replied. He whipped her every time she mentioned a part of herself she was proud of, which included leaving the Hound to die in the mountains. She was done playing this game. Fortunately for Arya, Jaqen later brought her to a house of faces. It was kind of gross but truly incredible. Hundreds of heads lined the walls of this underground lair. What does it all mean?!
Jaqen knew that Arya was not ready to give up being Arya, but she was ready to become someone else.
‘Game Of Thrones’: Fit To Rule?
Jorah and Tyrion had a nice chat by the sea, but it didn’t end well. Tyrion admitted he killed his father because Tywin was going to have him executed. He mentioned that he knew Jorah’s father from the Wall, but he accidentally revealed that his father had been murdered by his own men. Yikes.
Despite this little hiccup in their conversation, Tyrion was ready to ask the hard-hitting questions. Why was Jorah so Team Daenerys? Tyrion questioned Jorah on why Daenerys was so fit to rule. After all, the Targaryens were known for being 50 shades of crazy. These two were met by a group of pirates who were ready to kill Tyrion. Not only that, they wanted to chop off his dick. Yeah, they thought his cock had magic powers. Tyrion claimed that they couldn’t kill him before doing that because then the merchant that they wanted to sell his member to wouldn’t know that said penis came from a dwarf.
So, in a nutshell (pun intended), Tyrion being well-endowed saved his life.
The pirates were planning on taking them to the fighting pits in Meereen. This was OK news for Jorah because that’s where Daenerys was. He pledged he’d prove his worth.
‘Game Of Thrones’: Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken
Littlefinger made it to King’s Landing, and everything was different. He met with Cersei and admitted he’d found Sansa. Despite his involvement in all of it, Littlefinger revealed that Roose planned to marry Sansa off to Ramsay. The time for Cersei to strike was now. Ruh roh.
Over in Dorne, Myrcella and Prince Tristan were in love. He was ready for them to marry. Their little rendezvous was interrupted by Jaime and Bronn. However, Jaime’s plan to take Myrcella back to King’s Landing went up in flames when the Sand Snakes showed up. They vowed to be “unbowed, unbent, unbroken” for Oberyn. They initiated one epic fight before members of Dorne’s army showed up. Everyone was arrested. What a bummer.
‘Game Of Thrones’: Life Is Terrible
My sweet, sweet Loras was interrogated by the High Sparrow. Despite his true feelings for Renly, Loras denied any intimate relations with him. He denied ever having sex with men. Loras was so adamant about his answers, anyone would have believed him. Margaery was called and asked to swear by the gods that Loras was telling the truth. She stood by her brother.
Everything blew up in their faces when Olyvar was brought in. He went on and on about his sexual relations with Loras. Even Margaery knew about it, he said. Shockingly, Cersei even came to the Tyrell’s defense. When Olyvar mentioned Loras’ birthmark, Loras lost it. Because she flat-out lied, Margaery was arrested!
Over in Winterfell, Sansa was prepping for her wedding to Ramsay. Myranda showed up and made it pretty clear she had feelings for Ramsay. Sansa wasn’t going to have any of that. “This is my home and you can’t frighten me,” Sansa said.
Girl, you spoke too soon.
Sansa wed Ramsay in possibly the most gorgeous dress I’ve seen anyone wear in Westeros. It was so Winterfell chic. Theon gave her away. Ramsay and Sansa’s first night wasn’t exactly joyful. He pressed Sansa about whether or not she was a virgin. He told her to take off her clothes and made Theon WATCH.
Holy nuts. “You’ve known Sansa since she was a girl,” Ramsay said. “Watch her become a woman.”
‘Game Of Thrones’: Producer Attempts To Justify [SPOILER]’s Shocking Rape
I can’t even. Ramsay just RAPED Sansa. Thankfully, we didn’t have to watch, but the look on Theon’s face as it all happened destroyed me. Yes, she could have said “No.” But I believe she knew Ramsay would kill her if she put up a fight. Was it against her will? Absolutely. This is just so, so shocking. I can’t believe this happened to Sansa. I don’t exactly know where the show is going, and I can’t believe that this was deemed the right direction.
HollywoodLifers, what did you think of tonight’s Game of Thrones? Are you shocked by Sansa’s rape? Let me know!
— Avery Thompson
Follow @avery__thompson